Questions Not Asked That Should Be

There are so many QNAs (questions not asked about “sex”) that should be asked. Consider these.

A: Parental involvement is the greatest single deterrent to teenage sexual activity.” (Add Health Study USA 2000) Another strong motivators is signing a commitment card, especially if this step is taken at the end of a study on biblical teaching on sexuality. The True Love Waits covenant card reads: “Believing that true love waits, I make a commitment to God, myself, my family, my friends, my future mate, and my future children to a lifetime of purity including sexual abstinence from this day until the day I enter a biblical marriage relationship.” True Love Waits

A: Against HIV: 57-90%. For other STDs, from no risk reduction (for Chlamydia and Human Papilloma Virus) to 50-75% reduction (for gonorrhea).

Since the emphasis on “safer sex” practices is on using a condom, you should have a clear understanding as to how effective a condom is in preventing disease. First of all, in order to be effective at all, a condom must be worn every time, must have been properly stored, and must be properly used. In such cases of “perfect” use (did you know that this can only be achieved in a lab?), these are the statistics:

Against the HIV virus, it is between 57% and 90% effective. [Some studies have found 57%, some 90%, and some a percentage in between.) But this is true only for penile-vaginal (i.e. heterosexual) sex. Heterosexually transmitted HIV represents only 0.03% of all annual cases of STDs.
Against gonorrhea, “perfect” use of a condom prevents transmission of the disease 50-75% of the time, in men only. Most cases are not passed from female to male, and at any rate gonorrhea represents less than 2% of all cases of STDs.
That means that for 98% of all STDs there is no proof that condoms reduce the risk of transmission. (Scientific Evidence on Condom effectiveness for Sexually Transmitted Disease Prevention,” July 2001)

This helps to explain why three of every four sexually active adults in the United States currently have, or have had, an HPV infection (which can cause infertility and premature deliveries, and which kills far more women than does AIDS) and why every year three million Americans (40% of whom are 15-19-years-olds) contract Chlamydia (a cause of cervical cancer and of persistent, year-after-year abdominal pain).

A: There is so much in the Bible that explains to us what love should be and can be. Look, for example, at Jesus’ words in John 15:13: “Greater love has no one than this that one lay down his life for his friends.” That can also mean giving one’s life day by day in helping others to be what they can be.

Love is patient (I can wait). 1 Corinthians 13

Love is kind.

Love always protects (I will never ask you to do anything that would hurt you.)

Love always trusts.

Love always hopes.

Love always perseveres.

Love is not self-seeking (does not lust).

Love is not easily angered.

Love nourishes and cherishes.  Ephesians 5:25-33

A: So-called “Comprehensive Sex Education” provides information on contraception (methods, how to use, where to obtain) and condoms. It suggests alternatives to intercourse (mutual masturbation, for example, or oral sex – practices sometimes known as “outercourse” and said to be less risky than sexual intercourse). Abortion is promoted for girls who, in spite of these precautions, become pregnant. Abstinence is typically mentioned as “the only 100% safe” approach to sex but is usually dealt with very briefly and not considered a serious alternative.